Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Question the Second .2

"What you need to understand about Haruki Hatayama is that he was a child of privilege. His father is the feared Testuo Hatayama. Tetsuo built his fame and fortune by assassinating the last of the great world eaters, galaxy-sized, sentient fish that swam through space devouring whole systems. They were so massive, in fact, that they bent light around themselves and so, despite their size, their approach would be undetected until the entire system was gone. For thousands of years, the world eaters were the bane of all space fearing cultures.

"That is, until they ate Tetsuo Hatayama's world. At the time, he was a low level executive in Clan Platypus and, as such, had been selected to attend the annual smoke bomb conference in Lincoln, Nebraska. He chose a couple of promising looking models and then slipped out early. A snowstorm kept his interstellar cruiser from lifting off on time. He cursed and raved at the skies, but that snowstorm saved his life. He arrived back at home not three minutes after his galaxy had disappeared into the maw of the giant fish.

"Then and there, he swore he would have his revenge. He entered super-secret ninja training and taught his body to go without air, light or gravity for months on end. He hardened himself until his skin was like titanium and his bones were like cut diamonds. Then, he launched himself into space, naked but for the sword at his waist.

"Years he spent in those cold reaches, slingshotting around planets. Slowly, but steadily, he closed in on the planet eaters and, when he found one, he showed no mercy. He cared not to hear its cries for respite. He only needed their deaths. That time in the depths of space did something to Testuo. It made him cold and hard; nearly dead inside. In the end, he had eliminated the world eaters, to the elation of all space-faring cultures everywhere, but he had done it at the cost of his soul."

"Wow," I cut in. "That's some crazy talk goin on there. But I don't see how it's got nothin to do with us defeatin them ninjas." Boy howdy, I hate it when I'm expectin a straight answer and things end up gettin all twisted and weird. If I wanted to deal with that kinda steam-fudge, I'd watch the news.

"Nevertheless," the ghost army responded, "it is imperative you understand all this in order to defeat the Clan. And to understand that, when you choose to fight Haruki Hatayama, you are going up against an enemy of unimaginable power and a heartlessness rarely seen in the universe."